This morning, I woke up and my husband was not yet awake. I didn't want to disturb him, so I crept out of the room and got ready for work as he continued to sleep. I needed to brush my teeth, though, and the toothbrush was in the bathroom in the bedroom, which meant turning on the lights. And I didn't want to wake him up, so I thought I'd try to be sneaky.

(You see where this is going, right?)

So in the dark, I'm feeling around on the counter for my electric toothbrush. Found the toothbrush, snapped the head in. Felt around and found the toothpaste.

Now, a person that thinks ahead would have stopped here, left the room with these implements, and gone to the bathroom on the far side of the house where you can, you know, brush your teeth with the lights on.

NOPE! NOT ME!

For some reason, I decided that I could put my toothpaste on my brush in the dark. So I uncap the toothpaste, and put my finger against the side of my toothbrush bristles. I figure I can squirt, and once I feel the toothpaste on my finger, I'm good to go. Right? Right.

So I squirt. No toothpaste on the side of my finger. Hm. Well, the tube is half empty. Maybe I need to squeeze further down. So I squirt again. Still no toothpaste hitting my finger. That's odd. Now, though, I'm starting to smell toothpaste. Something's not adding up.

I squirt one more time and...hear a big splat.

Uh oh. At this point, I decide that being sneaky isn't worth it, and leave the room, toothbrush in hand. When I get into the light, I see...my toothbrush, covered in toothpaste all along the brush. Huge, heaping globs of it all down the brush. Covered. I have entirely missed the bristles, though.

I laugh at this...until I remember the splat. So I go into the bedroom and have to turn on the lights anyhow...and yep. I've gotten toothpaste all over the floor in big, nasty globs.

It's definitely a Monday.